


Deadly As The Black Widow's Bite

by GoofyGoldenGirl



Category: Marvel, Marvel Cinematic Universe
Genre: 1940s, Black Widow Program, Boarding School, Breaking and Entering, Cat, Child Abuse, Child Soldiers, Childhood, Childhood Trauma, Cold War, Confrontations, Dark, Death, Documents, Female Friendship, Friendship, Gen, Illnesses, Medical Experimentation, Murder, Mystery, Nightmares, Origin Story, Original Character(s), Orphanage, Pet Cat, Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder - PTSD, Red Room, Russia, Self-Defense, Spies & Secret Agents, Spying, War, World War II, fighting lessons
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-02-11
Updated: 2015-04-23
Packaged: 2018-03-11 21:23:17
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 8
Words: 13,524
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3333347
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/GoofyGoldenGirl/pseuds/GoofyGoldenGirl
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>
  <em>It is late 1943, the height of World War II. An eight year old girl, Natasha Rybakov, is orphaned. She is sent to a special school where young girls like herself are trained to become soldiers</em>
</p>
<p>
  <em>She would one day become Natasha Romanov </em>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>  <em>If anyone's interested I made a playlist to go along with the series: <br/>http://8tracks.com/goofyplaylists/deadly-as-the-black-widow-s-bite </em></p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

####  December 1943 

_Run! Run!_ Her mother had shouted. _Run and don't look back!_

The eight year old girl raced through the streets. She scanned for bomber planes overhead. Her eardrums rang with the sound of gunfire. She covered them with her hands

Natasha's family had been the last ones to leave the base. They were told it was the safest place, that they would live to see the end of the war. Her father, a captain, had been killed at Stalingrad. Her mother and younger sister had fallen only moments earlier.

The Germans mowed down everyone in their way. They were a slaughter machine, an unstoppable guillotine, and their rage showed no mercy. Men, women, children, soldier or civilian, they were all the same to them.

She leapt over the bodies that lay in her path, squeezing her eyes tight each time she did. The smell of death penetrated her nostrils and she choked back the bile that clogged her throat. Dizzy, with a hand on the wall, she stopped for a second to catch her breath. She looked down to see a pistol on the ground. Natasha picked it up. Its safety was off. She held it with her right hand and started to run again.

The forrest was closer. She could see the gathering of pine trees, standing close together in nearly perfect straight lines like soldiers at attention. She started to sprint. She would hide there and wait the war out.

It was then when the German soldier ran her way. A young man in his mid twenties at most; clad in a light olive green uniform that puffed out from all the layers underneath. On the left breast, a patch of an eagle hanging onto a swastika was sewn on, on the right a bar of multicolored badges. An oversized helmet sat on his head. His face was narrow and purple from the cold. She froze. The soldier stopped in his tracks and gazed down at her. 

" _Ein kleines mädchen?_ " Came his surprised, guttural sounding voice. 

She did not think. The fear took over. Natasha held up the pistol and pulled the trigger back. It fired. A second shot. A third. The German collapsed to the ground without a sound.

The blood dripped down from his chest onto the snow. His eyes were glassy and wide and residue blood bubbled at the corner of his mouth. Natasha's knees gave out. She sunk down, still clutching the pistol.

The next thing she knew, there were shouts behind her.

"There's a little girl here!"

A group of Russian soldiers had gathered around her. She felt a hand on her shoulder.

"Are you alright? Did he hurt you?" Someone asked.

She found she could not speak. Her limbs felt like as if they had been weighed down by rocks. She continued to stare down at the German soldier. 

"Come with us. We'll get you somewhere safe."

Hands pulled her up. It was suddenly as if everything flooded back into her brain. The sound of the pistol, the splatter of blood on the ground, the fear that pounded in her heart, the rotting odor of death. Her upper body jolted forward, her mouth opened, and she was sick.

A gentle yet tight grip supported her shoulders. A hand brushed her hair back. When her stomach had emptied she fell back into a soldier's arms.

"Shock," she heard a voice say. "Just like the one the soldiers have."

Arms picked her up. She stared blankly up at the soldier in a daze.

"Poor girl," came a whisper. "She's the only survivor here. Imagine the hell she has seen."  
**************************************************************************************************  
The clock on the wall ticked slowly. She sat on a wooden chair facing the desk, waiting for the headmaster to meet her. Only a day after the attack, a special military group came to escort her to an all girls' school for orphans. She had never been to a boarding school before. If the circumstances were different, she would have been excited; marveling about an adventure away from home. But she felt nothing except emptiness. The woman who led her to the office showed no disgust over the bloodstained dress she still wore, that she had not bathed since the attack, or her unkempt hair. It seemed like Natasha wasn't the first girl to arrive at the school in such a state. 

The door opened. A man, in his late forties walked in, dressed in a general's uniform. He was of average height, but extremely well built, with thick bulging arms and broad shoulders. He had short thick brown hair that was sculpted into a neat hairdo. His eyes, only a shade lighter than his hair were almond shaped and lined with wrinkles by the side.

"Ah hello," he greeted her.

She turned around and stared at him. He went over to the desk and sat down. Another adult would have found her rude. He didn't seem to care.

"Shall we introduce ourselves? I am Headmaster Volkov."

She did not answer, but continued to look at him.

"What's your name little girl?" He asked.

"Natalia. And I'm not little. I'm eight," they were the first words she had said in over a day.

"Last name?"

"Rybakova."

"Where are your parents?"

"Dead."

"Where are you from?"

"Does it matter? It's gone." 

"You killed the German soldier?"

"Yes."

"How?"

"I shot him."

The man smiled and leaned in.

"Would you like to kill more?" He asked.

She nodded.

"You have been brought to the right place," he said. "I train girls, like yourself, in the arts of war. How to use weapons. To fight hand to hand. How to win battles. This school was created by Stalin himself. Do you know what we call ourselves?"

She shook her head.

"The Black Widow," he said. "Do you know what a black widow is?"

"A spider."

"What's so special about her?"

"She is deadly. She eats her husband after they mate," Natasha answered. 

"That's right. The black widow is _deadly_ Innocent by appearance, luring their victims in to strike when their back is turned. That's what we train our soldiers to be. And you are our newest one." 

There came a knock at the door. The woman who saw her in stood at the door.

"Oh Mrs. Sorokina," Volkov said. "Can you take Miss Rybakova to be cleaned and measured for her uniform."

"Yes sir."

Natasha stood up and followed the woman.

Two hours later, after she had been scrubbed head to toe and dressed in a uniform that was a size too big for her, Natasha and Mrs. Sorokina entered a classroom. She clapped her hands. The students quickly got up and stood by the sides of their desks. There were twelve of them. They ranged from the ages of six to thirteen.

"Girls," Mrs. Sorokina announced. "This is your new classmate Natalia Rybakova. She just arrived today."

"Hello Natalia," the girls greeted her in unison.

"Hello," Natsha said flatly.

"Professor, I assume you can bring Miss Rybakova up to date on the lesson," Mrs. Sorokina asked the professor.

"Of course," he said. "We're learning about geography. Are you good at geography Miss Rybakova?"

Natasha nodded.

"Quiet one she is," Sorokina remarked. "They all are at first. I'll leave you here."

She closed the door and left. Natasha stood awkwardly at the door, avoiding their stares.

"Miss Rybakova could you have a seat here?" The professor motioned towards an empty desk in the first row.

Natasha did as she was told.  
**********************************  
Their curfew was at eight o clock. Natasha and the other girls walked in a single file to the dormitory, led by the matrons who held candles. It was a large room, sparse, the only furniture were the beds which were lined up in the middle of the room. The walls were a whitish-biege. The room only had two windows, on the wall across from the door.

The girls quietly walked over to their beds. Natasha was directed towards an empty one in the second row. She laid down. The bed was too narrow and the blankets thin. The pillow was hard. Natasha made a move to turn onto her side when she felt a tight grip on her wrist. 

One of the matrons was gazing down at her. She moved Natasha's arms over her head and snapped a pair of handcuffs across her wrist. 

"What are you doing?" She asked, frightened.

"They help you sleep child," the matron said. "You'll get used to them in time."

The matrons left. Natasha followed them with her eyes until the doors closed. She struggled against the restraints, feeling a scream form in her throat. The other girls had already fallen asleep. They were still, sleeping like little angels. 

Defeated, Natasha stared up at the ceiling until drowsiness overcame her. Yet her sleep wasn't peaceful. The sound of a pistol firing nearly burst her eardrums, she lay on the ground, covered in blood from head to toe, her legs askew and hurting. She attempted to move her legs, to sit up, but the pain weighed her down. Her heart pounded, wanting to flee, wanting to run away from whatever threatened her.

It was that moment in the dream when she tilted her head up and looked out. The corpses of her parents, sister, and the German soldier lay in front of her, their bodies just as bloody and mangled as she was.

She let out a scream.


	2. Chapter 2

#### 1944 

Every single student of the Black Widow program was expected to adhere to the schedule one hundred percent of the time. The only exceptions allowed were illness, physical injury, or death. 

The typical school day was as followed:  
6:00 Wake up call: _The matrons would unlock the handcuffs chaining the students to the beds. They had fifteen minutes to change into their uniforms, grab their books for the morning, and report to the dining hall. Appearance had to be neat: hair in the proper braids, a clean uniform, and a pleasant attitude towards the day. Unkempt uniforms, hair, and tiredness were punished by slaps to the face_  
6:15-6:45 Breakfast  
6:50-7:50 Class one  
7:55-8:55 Class two  
9:00-11:00 Gym: _Exercises and training consisted of: running, swimming, wrestling, fencing, combat fighting, gun and weapons training, gymnastics, ballet, and tennis._  
  
11:00-11:30 Get ready for the afternoon: _Used to shower, change and gather books and supplies for afternoon_  
11:35-12:35 Class three  
12:35-1:05 Lunch  
1:10-2:10 Class four  
2:15-3:15 Class five  
3:20-4:20 Daily assembly: _The students would attend a lecture led by Headmaster Volkov, Mrs. Sorokina, and other professors. Among the many topics discussed were: issues pertaining to the school and student body, the virtues of Communism, the decadence of the west, the heroics of Lenin and Stalin,the evils of the Nazis, and an update on the war_  
4:25-6:00 Extracurricular activities: _Organized by Mrs. Sorokina. Included arts and crafts, music lessons, cooking, sewing, and gardening. Also included events for organizations such as the Young Octoberists and the Young Pioneers_  
6:00-6:55 Free slot: _Used for study and downtime._  
7:00-7:30 Dinner  
7:30-8:30 Free slot: _Used for study, downtime, and to get ready for bed_  
8:30-6:00 Sleep: _The girls were chained to their beds and the lights were turned off_

Classes were held from Monday to Saturday. Sunday was the only free day, along with several holidays during the year. But even the free days were strictly regulated. 

The basic subjects taught at the school were: reading and writing, math, history and geography, and science. In addition to that: German, codes and decoding, technology mastery, and various other spy skills. The basic subjects were divided by skill level depending on the lesson. The spy classes weren't. The classes alternated from day to day: one set of classes was held on Mondays, Wednesdays, and Fridays. The other set took place on Tuesdays, Thursdays, and Saturdays.

By the end of the year, four more girls had joined the school, making a total of seventeen.  
**********************************************************************************************  
It was a Tuesday morning when the students woke up to an unpleasant situation.

"What is this?" Mrs. Sorokina pushed the clump of wet sheets of off one of the beds.

The caretaker stared down at a short, skinny, blonde haired, blue eyed girl around Natasha's age. She was one of the newer girls and had arrived from Leningrad two weeks prior. Her shaking hands covered her face.

"It was an accident!" She whimpered. "I won't do it again! I promise!"

The other girls in the room hovered around Mrs. Sorokina and the girl. They whispered amongst each other. 

"What happened?" Natasha groggily asked.

"Eva wet the bed," one of the girls, Anya or Olga told her. 

"You are a _soldier_ " Sorokina hissed. "Not a helpless baby!"

"I couldn't move! I couldn't move!" The girl cried.

"That is no excuse for your filth!"

Natasha couldn't believe what she was hearing. It was not Eva's fault that she wet the bed. She did not have the same amount of control she normally would. It made Natasha think of her younger sister Nadia who now would have been six. She used to have the same problem. But instead of getting angry at her,their parents were only kind and understanding. Many children wet the bed and eventually they grew out of it. It was a normal part of life.

"I'm sorry! I'm sorry! Please--"

Natasha only watched in horror as Mrs. Sorokina's hand slapped Eva's face. The girl fell to the ground and she let out a new round of sobs. 

"You will spend your time before class cleaning up your mess," Mrs. Sorokina harshly told Eva. 

"But--what about breakfast?" Eva blubbered.

"Have you not heard? You will clean your mess. Get up!"

Natasha felt her body move forward. One of her classmates held her back.

"Don't. You don't want to get in trouble," she muttered. 

"And you!" Mrs. Sorokina shouted at the other girls. "Get dressed and report to the dining hall!"

Natasha found Eva in the bathroom, half dressed, scrubbing the wet sheets with water and soap by the tub. The soiled nightgown and underwear lay on the floor.

She approached her.

"Here. Let me help you," she said as she grabbed one of the ends of the sheets.

"No. I have--"

"It's ok. I used to help my sister with this. And it's easier if there's two people."

"Thank you," Eva smiled through her tears.

The two girls began to clean the sheets and clothing.

"You're Natalia right?" Eva asked.

"Call me Natasha," Natasha said. 

They were quiet for a few seconds before Eva piped up:

"Where are you from?" 

"Stalingrad," Natasha said. "Until we had to leave. My father was in the military. We were sent to a base. But they ended up dying anyway."

"My parents are dead too. We had no food. My brother's in the army. I don't know if he's alive," Eva said.

It was just like any of the other stories from the other girls. Families dead, fathers and brothers in the army, towns and cities destroyed and ransacked. 

"Do you think I'm a baby?" Eva asked.

"No," Natasha said. "You're not. You couldn't get up. Don't listen to Sorokina."

"But this always happens to me when I have nightmares," Eva sniffed. 

"I get nightmares too," Natasha reached out and put a hand on her shoulder. "I get nightmares about how I came here. And I wake up screaming. But I can't stop them from coming. You can't control nightmares."

"Did you also kill a soldier?"

Natasha nodded. 

"I shot him. I was running away after they attacked the base and he found me. He shouted at me. I didn't know German but then I learned. He said _A little girl_ Like he was surprised. And I shot him again and again. And I sat by him with the gun in my hands."

Natasha's voice was choked up. She could feel her hands start to shake. 

"And you?"

"A plane crashed in the potato field. And a pilot crawled out with blood all over him. I took a shovel on the ground and I hit him and hit him till he was dead. And then it started to rain. And the rain mixed with the blood."

Eva began to tear up again.

"And that's when I always wake up! And I feel that the blood is all over me! And I'm wet and wet all over!"

Natasha pulled Eva into a hug. She held her close. Eva cried into her shoulder. Natasha had begun to weep as well. For the first time since she came to the school, she let her fear and guilt out.

She didn't feel lonely anymore.  
**********************************  
The walls of the gym were painted red. The floor was black. The colors were crisp and stood out from the subdued walls and floors of the classrooms and dorms. They made Natasha nervous. It reminded her too much of the blood that flowed from the German went she shot him, and how they stained his gloves and boots. But she forced herself to walk on.

Lately they had been training how to fight one on one. The girls stood around in a circle facing the two fighters. Mrs. Sorokina gave the signal to start and the fighters unleashed hell. Kicks, punches, shoves, clawing at the face, twisting arms and legs, the girls were told to fight like they were staring death right in the eye. And the others looked on in silence with blank expressions, knowing that if they showed shock, fear, or shouted, Sorokina would pick them to fight next.

The fight was over when one of the fighters hit the ground or visible injuries started to show. The girls were not allowed to scream or cry from the pain. They had to be strong and valiant soldiers. Emotions could not cloud the mind.

If they were injured they had to ask permission to go to the infirmary. Mrs. Sorokina would glance the girl over and decide if it was serious enough to warrant medical attention. 

"Rybakova and Laskina!" Mrs. Sorokina called out.

Natasha pushed forward towards the middle of the circle. She faced her opponent, Olga Laskina, a twelve year old girl. She clenched her fists and rolled back her shoulders. She moved one foot forward and the other back.

"Three. Two. One. Fight!"

Natasha slid her foot forward and aimed her fist at Ogla's face. But the girl moved to the side and her arm grabbed Natasha's shoulder. Natasha clutched one of her braids and gave them a yank. They spun around, trying to pull the other down. Olga kicked Natasha's shin. Natasha's hand tried to push Olga's head while her free hand 

Olga was strong. She had been longer in the program than Natasha and she was older. Natasha feared what would happen if Olga ended up hurting her.

_Think_ She told herself. _Think_

Suddenly it was clear.

Natasha stopped and loosened her grip on Olga. Olga shoved her down.

Natasha let herself fall long enough to move her foot behind Olga. It knocked against Olga's ankle. Natasha then jumped up and grabbed the girl from behind by the neck and hair.

She slammed her down to the ground. Olga let out a yelp. The other girls gasped.

"Silence!" Sorokina shouted.

Natasha removed her hands from Olga. The girl lay on the floor and she weakly raised her hand.

"Permission to go to the infirmary?" Olga asked.

She stoically glanced at Sorokina. Her nose and lips were bleeding and her forehead and eyes showed bruises.

"Permission granted," Sorokina responded.

Olga slowly got to her feet. She limped towards the door. Natasha gazed down at her trembling hands, feeling the horror stir through her.

"Good technique Rybakova," Mrs. Sorokina said. "Next!"

Natasha sat on the floor in a daze, still gazing down at her hands. She felt the impulse to howl creep up her throat. But she remained silent. She was a soldier. She could not be seen as weak.  
*********************************************************************************************************************************************************************************  
The two girls were inseparable. During free time and meals they were together. Giggling, joking, doodling in notebooks, coming up with games, and playing with cutout paper dolls and clay animals, Natasha and Eva found an escape from the strictness and abuse the school threw at them.

"I'm hungry," Eva piped up one afternoon during free time. Everyone was hungry. The school gave them enough food to last for the day, but they were never allowed seconds or could request more of a certain food. Coming from Leningrad where she had nearly starved, the feeling of hunger and the compulsion to eat was felt at all hours. Sometimes it was strong enough to make her ill. Even though she was back to eating three times a day, she still had not regained the weight she lost and had not grown an inch. She still was one of the smallest girls in the school.

"You'll think they'll give us more food today?" Natasha wondered. 

"Maybe today," Eva hoped. "You know what I wish? I wish my mama was around to cook."

"Mine too," Natasha agreed. "I miss her food. My mama made the best stew ever. Beef, potatoes, carrots, and it was juicy. I think she put milk in it if we could."

"My mama made bread. Every day. It was better than the ones at the bakery. It was soft and crunchy, and fluffy," Eva closed her eyes for a second and smiled. 

"Eva."

"Yeah?"

"Let's get some bread."

"What?"

"We're hungry. They won't notice if we took one loaf of bread," Natasha said.

"What if they catch us?"

"They won't. We're spies in training. They'll never catch us," Natasha grinned. "Let's go now!"

Natasha and Eva ran towards the kitchens, constantly checking to make sure they were alone. The smell of cooking meat brushed against their noses and made their mouths water. They hid behind the place where the wall jutted out and peeked out.

"Is there anyone there?" Natasha asked.

"Only the cook," Eva said. The kitchen door was open and they could hear the cook humming as she prepared the meal. "We need to get her out."

"How?"

"I don't know. Hit her?"

"We can't hit her. We'd get hit back."

"What else can we do?"

Eva turned around.

"We'll think of something."

They turned around and began to walk back. Suddenly a loud noise came their way.

It was the science teacher. He was rolling a cart full of boxes. A _ribbit_ came from one of them.

The two girls grinned.

"We need to get that frog," Natasha said.

The two girls began to follow the professor, trying to be as quiet as possible. They hung to the walls and hid in the shadows. The professor stopped at one of the classrooms. He took a box and carried it in.

Natasha and Eva rushed to the box and began to rummage through each one. Luckily, the frog was still there.

"It's better than being dissected," Eva said as she picked the frog up. "You're in good hands." She covered the mouth to prevent it from croaking.

Natasha made sure the boxes looked exactly the same as they were before. They ran away again. The professor came back out and took another box. He didn't suspect a thing.

They were back at the kitchen door. Eva let go of the frog and it hopped into the kitchen a few seconds passed before a scream was heard.

"Get out of here you rascal!" The cook shouted. Sounds of a wooden spoon banging against a hard surface, the crash of pots and pans, and curses were heard.

Natasha and Eva snuck in. They crept under the main table where the bread was kept in a basket. Eva peeked out to see that the cook was distracted. When her back was turned, Natasha reached up and took a loaf of bread.

The frog hopped out. The cook pursued it, her intent changing from chasing the animal out to killing it. As soon as they were sure that the cook was out, Natasha and Eva headed out of the kitchen. Natasha hid the bread in her sweater. They made their way to an empty classroom and Natasha closed the door.

She took out the bread. The girls squealed and clapped their hands.

"We did it!" Eva exclaimed.

"We did!" Natasha laughed. "Bread!"

She broke it in half and gave the bigger piece to Eva. They began to eat.

"Tasha," Eva said. "I don't think I've been this happy in a long time."

"Me too," Natasha smiled. "I'm glad you're sharing this with me Eva."

Later at dinner that night, Natasha and Eva found that they left the table feeling full. The bread had worked wonders.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> _Historical Context_   
> _* The Young Pioneers and The Young Octorberists were popular childrens' scouting groups in the Soviet Union._   
> _*Leningrad: from 1941-1944 the city of Leningrad (now St. Petersburg) was attacked by the Germans. They cut off the city from the rest of the USSR and subjected it to air bombings. This led to severe starvation and as many as nearly one million deaths_   
> _*The Battle of Stalingrad from 1942-1943 was a turning point in the war. After months of fighting, the Russians pushed back the Germans. This marked the beginning where the Allies had the upper hand._


	3. Chapter 3

####  1945 Part 1 

The newest addition to the school was a cat. The kitchens had a mouse problem and instead of resorting to traps or poison, the school decided to take an approach more in line with the school's beliefs.

It was a young cat, about two to three years old. It was slender with a short light gray coat and olive green eyes. Its arrival caused a stir in the mundane lives of the students and they would crowd around the kitchen doors to get a glimpse of the feline. 

A few times the cat was brought to the lessons to demonstrate stealth tactics. The girls gathered around in a circle as the professor placed a mouse at one end of the circle and held onto the cat at the other.

"You my dear girls, are the cat," the professor started. "Your victim is the mouse. Watch carefully. See how the cat stares down at the mouse. It asserts its dominance, it plans its attack. It is stoic. It intimidates. It is in control. It shows no weakness, only determination."

The cat was set loose. It darted after the mouse.

"Watch how the cat moves," the professor pointed out. "It is light on its feet. Its movements are precise, like a dance. It uses all its senses; sight, sound, taste, touch, to guide it along the way. It will manipulate the mouse to its will. See how the cat tricks the mouse into believing it is safe. See how for just that second, the mouse relaxes. Then the cat strikes."

The cat pounced on the mouse and sunk its teeth into its neck.

"You must use whatever you can to bend and break your victim. And like the cat with the mouse, your kill must be quick and clean. The cat is cold and calculating. Be the cat."

Natasha and Eva eyed the cat who was was curled up by the kitchen door. The cook had just ran out with a scream; something about how the kitchen was already run over by mice, now frogs, and if the board didn't do something, the Germans would be next to pop up.

"Come here cat!" Eva called out to the cat. "Come here!"

The cat lifted its head and glanced about. It went back to lying on the ground. 

"It has a mind of its own. It's not going to come unless it has to," Natasha walked over and picked it up. The cat tried to wiggle its way out of Natasha's grasp but her arms locked him in. She sat back down next to Eva and they let out squeals.

"It's so cute!"

"Aww!"

They began to pet the cat. The cat, once tense, began to relax.

"It's so soft!"

"Look at the eyes!"

The cat blinked up at them.

"Is it a boy or a girl?" Natasha asked.

Eva picked the cat up and glanced down at the belly.

"It's a boy," she said.

"He needs a name. What do we call him?"

"How about Misha? He looks like a Misha." Eva suggested. 

"Misha! That's a nice name for a cat," Natasha smiled.

"Do you like the name Misha?" Eva asked the cat.

He let out a meow. The girls giggled. 

"I want a cat someday," Eva sighed.

"Me too. I love cats." 

"Maybe when we're sent to Moscow, they'll pair us together for the living arrangements. We can get cats."

"From where?"

"Somewhere. There has to be places with cats."

"We can have a boy cat and a girl cat."

"Then they'll have kittens!"

"Kittens!"

Misha meowed again.  
*************************

####  Wednesday, May 9

Straight after dinner, the girls were rushed to the auditorium. The students got into two lines and stood at attention. Natasha wasn't sure what was happening. She had heard rumors that the Germans were about to surrender and that negotiations were being conducted at this moment.

The headmaster and Sorokina stood on the stage on each side of a large radio. It blared the national anthem as the students settled in. Then an announcer came on, saying that Stalin was to address the nation.

There was a pause then a man's voice broke the silence:

_Comrades! Men and women compatriots!_

_The great day of victory over Germany has come. Fascist Germany, forced to her knees by the Red Army and the troops of our Allies, has acknowledged herself defeated and declared unconditional surrender._

Several girls gasped. With stern glances from the headmaster and Sorokina, they fell silent once more. They listened as their leader told them in a calm, collected tone how the surrender came to be. Natasha felt her heart lift. She broke out into a grin. The tension in the room was bubbled over. Although they stood at attention, they all fidgeted. They were silent, but whispers floated about the room. It had gotten so quiet that the sound of hearts pounding echoed, as if to provide a backup rhythm to the tempo of the speech. 

_Comrades! The Great Patriotic War has ended in our complete victory. The period of war in Europe is over. The period of peaceful development has begun. I congratulate you upon victory, my dear men and women compatriots! Glory to our heroic Red Army, which upheld the independence of our Motherland and won victory over the enemy!_

_Glory to our great people, the people victorious! Eternal glory to the heroes who fell in the struggle against the enemy and gave their lives for the freedom and happiness of our people!_

The broadcast ended. And then…

It was like a dam burst.

The room erupted with screams and cheers. Some girls were crying. Others jumped up and down, grabbing hands, reaching out to hug those close to them. Laughter filled the room and several girls had started to sing the national anthem. Only the adults were calm, but even they could not hide their smiles as they watched the scene.

Natasha was caught in the frenzy. She let out a mix between a laugh and a shriek. She clapped her hands, jumping up and down like a child much younger than her age. Her hands reached out to touch others, to squeeze hands, pull those around into a hug, to give a pat on the shoulder. She never bothered to let any of the other girls into her life besides Eva, but now, she felt a bond run deep between all of them. They had triumphed together. 

"The war is over!" she screamed. "The war is over!"

"Natasha! Natasha!"

Eva ran up and wrapped her arms around Natasha. Natasha hugged her back.

"The war's over!" Eva exclaimed. "The war's over!"

They had gone still. Natasha pulled Eva close to her, rocking her back and forth. Eva began to weep.

"I wish my mama, papa, and Ivan lived to see this," Eva whispered mournfully.

"I know. I wish mine did too," Natasha could feel herself get choked up.

She thought of what could have been if they all had survived. She tried to picture their old apartment in Stalingrad, how it used to be. Papa would be sitting in the wooden chair in the living room with the paper in his hands, studying it intensely. Mama sang as she cooked, in a warm and comforting voice. Nadia crouched down by the chair with the doll that she and Natasha used to share, involved in a made up game. 

_Play with me Natasha!_ She could almost hear Nadia's sing-song tone.

Their parents would smile at them and watch as they played. A tear rolled down Natasha's cheek and she shakily let out a sob.

But the cause of her grief had ended. The war was over. She was safe. She would move on with her life. 

The Headmaster made an announcement that classes would be canceled the next day. A special holiday was planned. The whoops from the students rivaled the ones that came after the news of the war's end.

Natasha smiled once more. Like Stalin said, it was a time of peace. A time of celebration. She could use a few happy days.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> _If anyone wants to listen to the victory speech Stalin gave you can find it here (it has English subtitles)_ :https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Mt0SACqvubg  
>  _If you're more of a reading type, here's a transcript_ : https://www.marxists.org/reference/archive/stalin/works/1945/05/09v.htm


	4. Chapter 4

#### 1945 Part 2

The first set of girls who turned fifteen graduated. 

They were sent to Moscow where they would begin the second part of training.

A ceremony was held where the headmaster gave a speech congratulating them. At the end, the student body saluted the girls goodbye. 

In their place, three new girls arrived at the school, making a total of nineteen.   
***************************************************************************************  
It was a Tuesday afternoon when Mrs. Sorokina walked in not only with the German professor but a stranger. A young woman in her twenties with curly blonde hair. 

Sorokina clapped her hands. The students rose and stood at attention.

"I have an announcement to make," Sorokina began. "Starting now, the language class will not only focus on German, but English as well."

No one said a word, but confused looks were shot across the room. Natasha wondered why they were going to learn English. From what she knew, many of their future missions would take place in Germany.

"I am here to introduce your new English professor, Professor Belova. She will spend half of this slot teaching you English while Professor Orlov spends the other teaching you German."

"Oh please, call me _Dottie!_ " The woman exclaimed with a chuckle.

"Hello _Dottie_ ," the girls responded. The strange English word was fun to say.

The girls smiled back. Some giggled until Mrs. Sorokina shot them a stern look.

Natasha's doubts about learning English slipped from her mind as Professor Dottie started to teach the lesson.  
****************************************************************************************************************************  
The water trickled slowly from the bathroom sink. Natasha ran her toothbrush underneath, then moved over so Eva could get water to splash her face. 

It was only 7:40, but the two girls found it was easier to get ready for bed this early then to have to compete for the sinks later.

" _Dottie_ is amazing," Natasha said.

"I still can't believe she brought candy to class!" Eva exclaimed. 

Over the past few weeks, Professor Dottie had become the school's favorite professor. None of the girls had ever had a teacher who had been this friendly to them before. Her methods of teaching were fun. It wasn't just grammar, reading difficult passages from books, and writing out sentences over and over again: they learned songs, practiced speaking with conversation exercises, performed skits, and watched movies such as _Snow White_

"I wonder what we'll do tomorrow," Natasha said.

"Maybe she'll come with cake!" Eva chuckled.

"A chocolate cake," Natasha noticed that she was drooling. She began to brush her teeth once more.

The door burst open and Olga ran in, with a hand over her mouth. She rushed into the nearest stall, not bothering to close the door. She hung over the toilet bowl and proceeded to violently retch.

Natasha and Eva turned around.

"Olga? Are you ok?" Eva asked, concerned.

"Don't worry about me," Olga groaned. "I just have period cramps."

The two younger girls had already learned about what menstruation was. The students had to attend a special lecture about it which was given by Mrs. Sorokina and the head nurse. The lecture occurred after an incident where one of the older girls got her first period in gym and the students who had no knowledge as to why the girl had bloodstains on her skirt and underwear, raised a racket;scared that their classmate was severely ill or dying. It was the only time that Natasha could recall that none of the men of the faculty, including the headmaster, attended.

"Do you want me to get one of the matrons?" Natasha asked.

"No," her voice was hoarse. "I can manage this on my own."

Natasha and Eva quickly left Olga alone.  
**********************************************  
Within three days, a series of odd events happened. The students woke up the next morning to find that Olga had been taken to the infirmary in the middle of the night. The day after, another girl, Sasha was late for breakfast because of an upset stomach. The third day, a girl named Irina vomited in science class. 

Natasha and Eva sat by the kitchens during their free time. They petted Misha the cat who was curled up in Natasha's lap and talked about possible ideas as to what was going on.

"Maybe there's an illness going around," Eva suggested.

A week had passed. No one else in the school appeared to be sick, particularly the other girls. If there had been an illness going about, someone would have also have caught it by now. 

"What if they also had their period?" Natasha said next.

But Natasha and Eva would have known. Privacy was hard to keep in the school. Either they would have known from bloodstained sheets or clothing, or when the matrons handed out the boxes of pads or rags meant to last for the week. 

The two older girls were taken to the infirmary as well. The three did not come back for a few days.  
****************************************************************************************************************  
A week later,the students headed from the dormitories to their third class. They walked in a single file, escorted by Sorokina. The girls were lined up by height, the smaller girls walked in the front, the taller ones in the back.

Natasha was situated in the middle. She did not realize that the girls behind her had stopped until she heard gasps.

"Mrs. Sorokina!" Someone called out.

The line broke. The girls gathered around in a circle. Sorokina rushed over.

"Olga's fainted."

Natasha watched as the headmistress knelt down and pressed a hand on Olga's forehead. The girl's skin had turned pale, her mouth hung open just a little, and she still was unconscious. 

"Get to class," Sorokina ordered the students.

Without question, the girls briskly hurried off. They spoke in whispers or walked in silence.

Later that day, Natasha and Eva sat by the kitchens, watching Misha pace about. They were quiet for a long time.

"What's going on?" Eva broke the silence.

"I don't know," Natasha said, worried. "What if we're next Eva?"

"Tasha. Why would we be next?"

"I don't know," Natasha admitted. "But something is happening to them and I'm scared!"

Eva grabbed Natasha's hand.

"I'm scared too! I don't want things to get worse!"

"Then what do we do?"

"What _can_ we do? We can't do anything. We know _nothing_. It's not like we can fight whatever's happening. There's nothing to punch at."

Suddenly, it clicked.

"We _can't_ punch," Natasha said. "We still don't _know_ anything!"

"What are you saying?" Eva asked.

Natasha grinned.

"Remember what they said in class about good spies? They always do investigating."


	5. Chapter 5

####  1945 Part 3 

Instead of frogs, they used Misha. The two girls set the cat loose close to the infirmary door. The few tools they carried were a flashlight and safety pins which they had stolen from the supply closet. Eva turned on the flashlight and flashed it on the door. The cat jumped up and pounded his paws on the door in an attempt to catch the light. No noise came from inside, no one came to the door. It was clear.

Natasha and Eva opened the door and went inside. Misha followed them.

The infirmary itself was not kept locked, but its office was. They passed the empty rows of hospital beds and reached the far end of the wing. They repeated the same test again; the flashlight was lit and Misha pawed at the door. No response. Natasha turned the doorknob. to find it was locked. She inserted the safety pin in the lock and placed another one underneath. She worked the safety pin around until there was a click and she was able to turn the knob.

They entered. The office was small and squared shaped. The walls were painted a dull white like the walls of the infirmary. The only source of color that stood out came from the mahogany desk and chairs at the other end of the room. On the left and right sides sat two gray filing cabinets.

"I'll take the desk. You take the cabinets," Natasha said.

The two girls went straight to work. Natasha opened the desk drawer and looked inside. It was empty except for a medical dictionary. She looked over the top of the desk. It was neat, with two stacks of paper, a pencil on the side, and an empty mug. She gingerly flipped through the papers. None of importance.

"I found some files," Eva said in a low voice.

Natasha crossed over to her friend and looked over her shoulder. The first page had the names of the three girls who had fallen ill.

_Olga Laskina: DOB: 21/3/1932. POB: Istra, Moscow. Family: Deceased. YOE: 1943_

_Sasha Gurkina: DOB: 17/5/1933. POB:Tula, Tula. Family: Mother and siblings, deceased. Father: MIA. YOE: 1943_

_Irina Belkina: DOB: 6/9/1932. POB: Petrovichi, Smolensk. Family: Deceased. YOE:1943_

Below, the girls' height, weight, and overall health condition were listed. Eva flipped to the next page. 

_3/9/45: Laskina was referred to the infirmary after severe vomiting. Persisted for two days. Was given antiemetics. Condition is now stable although patient has complained about sensitivity to certain types of food, such as fish. She claims her appetite has increased in the past few weeks._

_4/9/45: Gurkina was referred to the infirmary after complaints of nausea and diarrhea. Was given a different type of antiemetic than Laskina. Patient claims that certain foods such as fish and pork trigger the symptoms and that her appetite has decreased. Stay in infirmary lasted for three days._

_5/9/45: Belkina was referred also for severe vomiting. Given the same type of antiemetics as Laskina. Does not complain of food sensitivity, but like Gurkina, she has also lost her appetite. Her stay only lasted for a day. Was the most resilient._

Natasha thought it was strange that the word _resilient_ was used to describe Irina's condition. She did not know if most medical documents described their patients as so, but it seemed like the file was suggesting that the girls were supposed to have these gastrointestinal problems.

_Attach copy of report for Dr. Kudrin and Mr. Volkov_

They heard footsteps outside. 

Eva and Natasha glanced up. Eva quickly placed the file back in the cabinet. Natasha and Eva crept up to the door. They couldn't see anyone, but could tell that the head nurse was heading towards the infirmary.

"Punch me," Eva told Natasha. "Hit the nose!"

"But--"

"Do it!"

Natasha made a fist and aimed at Eva's face. She felt her knuckles sink into Eva's flesh. Blood began to run. Natasha bit her tongue and shook her fist. Eva winced and looked up at her. Her nose had been broken.

"Put your arm around me," she said.

Natasha did so. Eva loosened her knees, almost as if she couldn't walk. They moved towards the center of the room and stood there, just in time as the head nurse entered. 

"Petrova was in a fight and I think her nose is broken," Natasha lied.

"Let me look," the head nurse gestured for Eva to sit on one of the beds. She examined Eva's gushing nose.

"It is broken," she said. "But it isn't a serious fracture. This will be easy to set."

Natasha watched as the nurse realigned Eva's nose. Eva kept a blank face throughout, but she squeezed Natasha's hand so hard that it hurt. 

"Did you win the fight?" The nurse asked Eva once it was over.

"Yes I did," Eva answered. "A bloody nose does not stop me."

"That is the spirit that all our soldiers must have!" The nurse said with a smile. "Run along now. You'll be late for dinner."

Natasha and Eva left the infirmary.

"Sorry I hurt you," Natasha apologized.

"It's nothing," Eva said. "Sacrifices must be made."  
**********************************************************  
From then, Natasha and Eva dove deep into their investigations. The girls observed and memorized the infirmary schedule. They knew when each nurse would be on duty, when they would take their breaks, and when the office would be left unlocked. They practiced moving about the halls silently so they would not be noticed. They came up with every single backup plan they could think of if they got caught; from excuses to violence if needed. They gathered items necessary---from hairpins and safety pins used to unlock the office door if it were closed, to pencils and paper to jot down notes while reading the files.

With the help of the science section of the library, Natasha and Eva discovered who Doctor Kudrin was. He was a biochemist, famous for for his research on hormones. He and Headmaster Volkov had previously worked together in a military laboratory before the war. There was a photograph in the book of the scientist and the headmaster, standing in front of an assortment of test tubes and beakers.

"Wait! We've seen him," Natasha pointed at the picture. "He's the man with the gray suitcase." 

Every few months, a well dressed man who carried a gray suitcase visited the school. He stayed for about three days at most, then would leave. No one questioned his visits.

"But he's not a real doctor," Eva said. "Why would they need him if they're trying to cure the girls' sickness?"

The months passed. The files were consistent on updating on the girls' health, but not on the cause:

_Gurkina has suffered from mood swings for the past few weeks. Yesterday, she had a meltdown and attacked a fellow student. Injuries were minimal. When asked why, she responded that she felt like she was having an out of body experience as it happened, like if she was a bystander and not the perpetrator._

_Muscle mass has gone up by 10%_

_Laskina complains about migraines. We have prescribed her the strongest medicine we have, but they persist. They can be so severe that she temporarily looses her hearing and will suffer from fainting spells_

_Dexterity has gone up by 50%_

_Belkina's menstrual periods have been irregular. She has not had one since May. We wonder if it's too early to deduce if she will be infertile in the future._

_Height has increased by 7.5 centimeters in the past two months_

_All three continue to have gastrointestinal aliments._

_Overall strength has increased by 100%_

Natasha and Eva could attest to the files' observations. They had seen the older girls complain of headaches, backaches, and stomachaches, seen them switch from cheeriness to pure rage within a matter of seconds. They witnessed the girls' increased strength and skill during training, and listened to Sorokina praise them; saying that Laskina, Gurkina, and Belkina were model students that the girls should aspire to be.

That was until the incident.

Sasha and another girl named Anya were sparing during training. The two girls were a perfect match; both in quick thinking and prowess. In speed, Sasha was the one who had the upper hand. But to her surprise she was caught off guard. Anya hurled her to the ground after getting her from behind. With a clap of Sorokina's hands, the fight was over.

"Next!" Mrs. Sorokina called out. "Rybakova and--"

"That's not fair!"

Sorokina turned her head towards Sasha who had just gotten to her feet.

"Excuse me Gurkina?" She asked coldly.

"I'm _better_ than Berezina!" She exclaimed. "I deserved to win!"

"This match is over," Sorokina spat back. "You lost. I will not tolerate such rudeness from a subordinate. Get out of the ring."

"You play favorites!" Sasha hissed. "I've seen you judge and all you do is pick who _you_ like! Anya can't move on her feet for _shit!_ _I_ can! I'm better than her!"

Natasha's jaw dropped. Several of the girls around her began to whisper nervously. Swearing at an adult was unthinkable.

Sorokina moved towards Sasha. She lifted her hand and struck her across the face. Sasha did not flinch nor did she make a move to get away. She defiantly stared at Sorokina.

"Know your place Gurkina," the headmistress warned her.

"You **bitch!** "

Sasha lunged at Mrs. Sorkina. Her hands wrapped around the headmistress' throat in an attempt to strangle her. The students screamed as they watched Sasha drag Sorokina to the ground. But the teacher was only biding her time. She elbowed Sasha in the chest and pinned her to the ground. There was a crunch as she brought down her boots on Sasha's hands. The girl shrieked. Her face turned purple. Blood dripped to the floor. Sasha's eyes rolled back into her head and she fainted.

The commotion caused several nearby workers and professors to run into the gym. Shocked and confused, they watched in a choked silence as Sorokina stepped off of Sasha's hands.

"Take her away!" She snapped her fingers.

The adults did so. The girl had just began to stir as she was carried out of the room. She let out a whimper and began to quietly sob.

Sasha did not return to the student body for another five hours. By then, she appeared to be subdued.  
******************************************************************************************************************  
Natasha woke up at six the next morning. She opened her eyes to see one of the matrons remove the handcuffs. She sat up and watched as the matrons continued down the row, getting each girl up and ready for the day. But on the second bed towards the end, one of the matrons stopped and hovered over the girl. Natasha watched as the matron bent over and touched the girl. Her hands shook as she covered her mouth.

"Sorokina!" She hollered.

The headmistress rushed over. It was enough to attract everyone's attention. The girls gathered around, trying to get a glimpse of what was wrong.

Sorokina and the matron stepped back just enough to allow a good view. Sasha was still lying on the bed. Her eyes were closed and her mouth slightly hung open. She had not moved since the matron walked over to wake her up.

Then, someone let out a cry.

It was Olga. She sunk to the floor with a sob. No one paid her attention. They continued to stare at the body on the bed.

Natasha turned her head towards Eva who had managed to get push through the crowd and get close. Their eyes met.

"I think Sasha's dead," Natasha said flatly.

Olga screamed.  
************************************************  
The time to break into the office couldn't have been better. All the medical personnel were busy with the autopsy and preparing Sasha's body for cremation. Natasha and Eva slipped right past them.

The files were on the desk. Natasha flipped through the pages to find that the data log had been updated. 

_6/12/1945: It is unfortunate that Gurkina has passed away. At 6:01 this morning, she was found to be unresponsive when the matrons went to wake her up. Again, this incident is most unfortunate, but it has given us valuable information._

_When we picked Gurkina to be the second subject, she was the ideal candidate. She was in peak health condition, a good student, and loyal to the cause and her school. We gave her two sets of doses: one on 24/8/1945 and another on 26/8/1945. We thought that her abilities would be enhanced, and they were. The tests we've ran indicated that her strength, speed, intelligence, and skill had increased. She had added 8 more centimeters to her height and gained at least 4.5 kilograms of muscle. Her senses were heightened, improving her vision and hearing the most. What we did not expect were the drawbacks, which occurred a week after the injections. By then, Gurkina's condition changed drastically. She was plagued with chronic diarrhea and nausea. Her heightened senses would cause her to be overly stimulated, sometimes triggering a nervous breakdown. During these incidents, she would hallucinate, or later describe a emotional detachment from herself. Overall, her emotional state was unpredictable. Long gone was the loyal and reliable soldier we had seen: she became arrogant, egocentric, and was prone to anger. One moment she would claim to be in a state of euphoria to only sink into a crippling depression. While we recorded that consistently her emotional state worsened before or during the first days of menstruation (Menarche only occurred a month before the dose) she was capable of suffering a breakdown at any time of the month._

_While all three girls experienced some form of physical and mental distress, Gurkina's was the most pronounced. She posed a danger to others and to herself. Comparing the findings to the past cases, there are no records of such drastic change except in the case of Johann Schmidt. However, it is noted that the doses that he injected were experimental, and that the formula was not complete. Taking this into account, we can only conclude that:_

_The serum must be administered before or after puberty. The adolescent state is too physically and hormonally vulnerable to handle such a power_

_We must place Laskina and Belkina in isolation for the next few days. We cannot allow any other incidents to occur. All concerns must be discussed with Mr. Volkov at the meeting._

"A serum?"

The two girls gazed at each other before looking down at the file again. They both had terrified expressions.

"Then that means--"

"That they were changed on purpose."

"What if we're next?"

It was too much for them to take in.


	6. Chapter 6

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> _Sorry I haven't updated like I used to. I've been busy lately. I'll try to put up the remaining chapters as soon as I can_

#### 1946 Part 1 

The student body was informed that Professor Belova would be going to America for a few months.

All the professors, Dottie included, went on missions once in a while, but she was sent more frequently. She had taken trips before--lasting about a week at most, the last time Natasha could remember. The missions were something that the students were forbidden to discuss. If any of the girls brought them up in front of the adults, the student would be silenced with a stern look and a rebuke. But when they were alone, some rules were easily broken:

"Why is it longer this time?"

"It must be really big!" 

"Maybe she'll steal something important. Like secrets!"

"What if they're trying to start a revolution?"

"Then _Dottie_ will be famous!"

"Maybe she'll kill someone!"

"Maybe it's the US _president._ "

"What's a president?"

"It's some sort of a leader. I heard he's really evil."

"I heard her talking to Professor Borina the other day. She said on the last mission she seduced a guy named _Howard Stark_

"Seduce?"

"It must be a very good manipulation tactic because it worked."

"Where is she gonna be?"

"A city I guess. New York, Washington DC... what other cities are there in America?"

"What's her cover gonna be?"

"A ballerina?"

"Do you think she'll eat a hamburger?"

"Why would ya wanna know if she'll eat a hamburger? That's stupid!"

"I heard hamburgers are really good ok!"

In the English classes, all they studied was about America. They learned the names of the different states, its government (and how it benefited from the evil of capitalism), how people lived day to day, its culture, and history. 

On her last day, Dottie brought in a surprise to the class. A dessert called cupcakes, which were very popular in America. Tiny muffin shaped chocolate sweets that were covered in a thick, creamy frosting. Headmistress Sorokina disapproved of the sugary treat, claiming that the girls shouldn't be spoiled and contaminated by "American filth," but the cupcakes quickly disappeared. It had been nearly a year since the girls had eaten desserts. 

America seemed like a fascinating place. Natasha hoped that one day, she'd travel there.  
**************************************************************************************************  
Natasha knew that she was one of the best in the class. 

The teachers all commented on that she was a quick learner, good at analyzing situations, and strong. She excelled at logic and linguistics as well as she did at sports and combat. Natasha was the perfect student: always on time, eager to learn, and who applied what she learned in her daily life. Her peers were told to look to her as an example.

Several of the girls were impressed at her skills. Others envied and despised her. The only one who truly admired and respected her was Eva.  
**************************************************************************************************************************************************************  
Natasha and Eva spent nearly six months working on their most dangerous break in yet.

The headmaster's office.

The records from the infirmary did not update as much as it used to. What had been every other day to a week, now was once a month. Any abnormalities were mentioned in passing with a: _(student's name) had another incident_

"Do you think they know that they're being watched?" Eva would ask.

"The files could be somewhere else," Natasha would reply.

Outwardly, the older girls showed no sign of distress, illness, or oddities. They continued to be the model students for the school community. But with one glance into their eyes, one could see that they were not all at there.

The information about the partnership between the headmaster and doctor led them onto another tangent. How and why the experiments started, and to what extent the headmaster was involved with them. They knew such top secret information would be kept somewhere safe, where few would could access it.

So Natasha and Eva began their plans. They devoted all their free time to research, spying on the office, practicing techniques they knew would come in handy.

"What if all the letters and files are in a safe?"

"Then we'll pick it."

"And if we're caught?"

"Say that Sorokina sent you."

"And if we have to fight him?"

"We run. Far away from here."

The two girls suffered from nightmares. 

Natasha stared up at the ceiling as she tried not to fall into the darkness. For hours she lay until she succumbed to the dreams of gunfire and red. In the mornings she stumbled about in a half awake, half asleep haze, falling back into her nightmare if she was disturbed by the slightest sound or touch.

Eva had outgrown the bedwetting---instead of wet sheets, she'd wake up in the middle of the night with a scream loud enough to wake up everyone in the room. With a whimper and a shaky breath, she'd try to calm down enough to fall back asleep. If she managed to: many mornings were spent dozing off during breakfast and class. 

They only had each other to lean on. 

Taking the other's hand as they made their way down the hallway towards class, making sure that she would not fall down. Or leaning on the other's shoulder and supporting her back as they ate breakfast. They watched each other in class, doing whatever they could to distract the teacher and other classmates from noticing the other had fallen asleep.

The day before it would all happen, just before they would head down to dinner, Eva wordlessly turned towards Natasha and embraced her. Natasha held her in a tight grip, her head just leaning over Eva's shoulder, listening to how rapidly their hearts beat. 

The will to cry had vanished in the past two years. The want remained.

Natasha felt her eyes sting as she forced her fear into the back of her head.

She blinked and gazed into Eva's hollow, azure blue eyes.

"We'll be ok," she tried to assure them both. "We'll be ok."  
************************************************************* 

#### 24 June, 1946 

It was exactly 6:01 pm when the two girls hid behind a corner a few feet away from the office.

It was empty. They made sure it was. Natasha and Eva forged a letter, making sure that it was typed and formatted exactly how the official letters from the commander center were. They used the letters from the infirmary as a reference and placed it in the mail exactly a week before. The letter was an invitation, asking Volkov to attend a meeting in Moscow. Once Volkov wrote the reply, Natasha and Eva intercepted it before it could be sent out.

Natasha picked the lock. She had gotten good at picking locks, and if it was a simple on, could do it under a minute.

They walked in. The office had not changed one bit since Natasha's first day at the program. All was silent, the only thing that was heard was the clock ticking on the wall.

Natasha walked over to the closet and searched it. There was nothing except a few jackets and hats. She closed it.

Eva was going through the desk drawers. She scanned each one before placing them back in the order they were found.

"Anything important?" Natasha asked.

"No."

Natasha opened one of the cabinets close by and picked up a file. She flipped through it. It had a list of student grades from the years 1943-1944. She took the file behind it. Another list of grades, this time from 1944-1945. She moved to the upper cabinet. There was nothing in it.

"Tasha."

She turned around to see an almost terrified look on Eva's face. She was clutching the edges of a paper.

"What is it?"

Eva only nodded as if to tell her to come over. Natasha went behind Eva to read the letter. It had been taken from an envelope that lay on the desk. It was addressed to Dr. Kudrin.

_Kudrin,_

_I agree with you completely. If we add the stabilizing agent, the serum will lose its side effects. But I think we should add six milligrams instead of twelve to balance it out with the rest of the chemicals. I fear that if we add to much it would compromise the nature of the formula and sent the subject into a state of sluggishness_

_If we carry out these tests we have to do them discreetly. Command was not pleased about the Gurkina incident and they threatened to draw back funding if another mishap were to occur. But if any of the girls step out of line, I am prepared to deal with them as I have with the Gurkina girl. The only difference will be that Command will not know a thing._

"Sasha was killed."

Natasha's voice wavered. She tried to keep a straight face, but knew that the tone of her voice betrayed her.

She went back to reading.

_I have provided a list of students that could be our next test subjects. I'm attaching their medical files along with this letter._

Natasha read through the list. It was a short one, with the names of students close to Natasha's age or younger.

She was about to set the letter down when she saw the last name:

_Natasha Rybakova. DOB: 22/11/1935. POB: Stalingrad, Stalingrad. Family: Deceased. YOE: 1943_

She dropped the letter. She could feel her legs shake. Eva rushed over and grabbed her gently around the waist.

"It's ok," she said. "It's ok. I got you."

With a slow motion, Eva knelt down and grabbed the letter. They started to the door.

"As long as we have this. He'll think he sent it. And it's gonna be ok," Eva assured her. "I won't let them touch you Tasha."

_Click. Click. Click._

The two girls froze. They recognized the sound. It was a woman's shoe hitting against the floor as she walked.

"In here!"

Eva shoved Natasha into the closet and closed it. Natasha peeked through the crack to see Eva rush over the desk and pick up the envelope.

"Eva!"

The sound grew louder. Eva pushed the letter back into the envelope and quickly closed it. She took a step when.

The noise stopped.

And the door opened.

Mrs. Sorokina stood there with an intimidating glare.

Natasha held her breath.

Eva's face had gone pale.

"What. Are. You. Doing. Here?" Sorokina's voice was cold.

"I came to deliver a letter," Eva replied.

Sorokina moved forward. With one hand she grabbed Eva's wrist and with the other she snatched the letter out of her hand.

Eva let out a whimper. 

"What are you doing?" Sorokina asked as she pocketed the letter. 

"I came to deliver a letter," Eva said again.

From the closet, Natasha could hear the nervousness in her voice.

"I will ask this again. What are you doing in a _locked_ office?"

"The door was open."

Sorokina twisted her arm. Eva gasped in pain. 

"This office was _locked_ Petrova!" Sorokina raised her voice.

She moved her arm to the side and Eva hit the floor with a thud. She let out a scream. 

Inside the closet, Natasha was shaking. She could only listen as fleshy sinking sound beat in time to the rhythm from the clock as Eva kept on shrieking. She forced her hands to cover her mouth, trying to force whatever sound she wanted to let out down her throat. 

Sorokina bent down over Eva's bruised figure and took hold of her braids. With a yank, she pulled her up and began to drag her out of the office.

"The headmaster would like to have a word with you," were the last words Natasha heard from Sorokina.

Eva let out a sob. 

Natasha sat still for what seemed like an eternity, counting the minutes from the clock's ticks . Finally, she opened the door by a crack and looked out. The coast was clear.

She fearfully glanced about the office before moving out. She kept the door open, just as it had been left.


	7. Chapter 7

####  1946 Part 2 

Eva was gone for a day.

She returned at night just before bedtime.

One of the matrons escorted her in. She was already dressed in her white nightgown, her curly hair set free from the braids that she hated so much. They led her to her bed, slowly.

As her eyes caught sight of Natasha, they lit up. 

Natasha was standing by her bed. She took a step towards her friend, feeling the worry that jumbled in her heart all day turn into relief.

"Eva!" She exclaimed. Her hand extended to touch her.

Eva reached out as well.

"Natasha," her voice trembled and her lips curled into a smile.

Their fingertips touched just as the matron yanked Eva away. Natasha watched as they moved on.

As Natasha was laid down to rest, she turned her head as if Eva's bed were right next to hers'. As if to say goodnight, to talk to to each other in low voices before the lights were turned out, happy to see that she was safe.

Eva's bed was in the in row behind Natasha's. But she could imagine that they were next to each other.

"Goodnight Eva. See you tomorrow," Natasha whispered.

She closed her eyes.  
**********************  
She heard the click of the key unlocking the handcuffs and she opened her eyes. Natasha sat up and slid her legs to the left side. She got up and kneeled by the bed to get out the box of clothes underneath.

"Sorokina!"

Natasha looked up to see Mrs. Sorokina rush by her and make her way to the back row. The other girls started to follow her. They crowded by the bed near the corner.

Natasha jumped to her feet and ran. She pushed the other girls out of her way as she reached the railing at the edge of Eva's bed.

She stopped. Her whole body went numb. Her hand gripped the railing as she let out a scream.

"Eva!"

Eva still lay on the bed. Her skin had turned a bluish white. Blood bubbled at the corner of her mouth Her eyes were closed.

"Eva!"

She lunged forward.

"Rybakova!"

Two sets of hands grabbed her. Natasha shoved them off her and put her hands on Eva's shoulders.

"Eva! Eva!" She frantically shouted. "Eva wake up! You have to wake up!"

But Natasha could only make her shoulders move. Her left hand cupped Eva's face. It felt cold. 

Natasha's hand dropped by her side. She let out a shaky gasp. Her lips shook.

**"Eva! "**

She sunk into the bed with a howl. Natasha clung to Eva, burying her head in between Eva's neck and the pillow. She rocked back and forth, feeling the tears cascade down her cheeks with each shriek. 

With one motion, two sets of hands ripped Natasha from Eva. She landed on her knees as she did three years ago. Yet she did not let the silence overcome her. She screamed and screamed until her throat cracked.

The others glared at her.  
****************************  
There would be no funeral. 

The school did not believe in remembering and honoring the dead who had not accomplished anything in her life. The dead was sent to the mortuary and cremated. 

The girls were supposed to be soldiers. They could not be weakened by death or the emotions that came with grieving.

The students were expected to move on like nothing had happened.

Natasha had been isolated from the other students that morning and kept under watch by one of the doctors. She was let go once she had calmed down.

She wandered back into the dormitory. No one was there. She reached the bed where Eva had slept. It was left in the same condition as before.

Natasha's fingers gently reached down and touched the pillow. Tears welled in her eyes once again. She squeezed it.

She felt a square shaped lump in the middle.

Natasha slid her hand inside the pillowcase and pulled out a folded piece of paper. She opened it and read:

_Natasha,_  
_If you are reading this I am dead. I thought I'd be safe. I thought I lied enough. But they didn't believe me. Even when I told them that I was waiting for the Headmaster. They gave me a shot of black widow venom. I don't feel so good Tasha my head hurts, I'm shaking, and I'm scared. My grandmama told me that when we die we go to a place called heaven and it's really nice there and you're happy. If my family's there then I'll see them again. And maybe one day I'll see you too. But don't come now. You have to keep fighting Tasha. You can get out of this Tasha for the both of us. I believe in you. I do because you're my sister. If someone asked me before if I had a sister I would have said no but then I met you. You're the best sister and the only sister I've ever had and I'm so happy that you were in my life and I wish we could go to Moscow together and save the world and share an apartment with all the cats. I miss you Tasha. I don't want to leave you but I promise that there will always be a part of me with you. And I'll watch you from heaven and I'll help you like you have helped me. Take care of Misha because he'll miss me too. Destroy this letter after you read it._  
_I love you forever,_  
_Eva_

Natasha held the letter close to her chest and wept. The anger and sadness boiled inside her. She cried for the friend who was her sister. The only person there who showed Natasha compassion and understanding, and let her do the same. She cursed the adults for ending Eva's life, wanting nothing more than to kill them by the most horrible ways she could think of. She cursed herself for letting Eva take the blame and suffer alone, wishing that she could have pulled her to safety or faced the punishment with her. And last, she cursed the German soldier that she had killed for leading her into this hell. 

She tore the paper. In half, quarters, eighths, until only tiny shreds were left. She walked over to the window and opened it. She threw the pieces into the air and watched as the wind blew them away.


	8. Chapter 8

####  1946 Part 3 

Natasha retreated back into her silence.

She lifelessly went through the motions. Day after day passed. School, training, and back to school again. New girls arrived and older ones graduated. No one mentioned Eva. It was as if she never attended the school at all. 

Natasha kept her emotions bottled up inside, refusing to let them out except for her anger. That she saved for training. She pretended that her opponent was Volkov, Sorokina, or Kudrin and she lashed out like a feral beast. Her opponents piled at her feet. With broken limbs, covered in blood, writhing and screaming. It would be then that Natasha snapped back as she realized that the woman who applauded her for her brutality was the same one who deserved that anger.

She lived in fear. Every day she was aware that she could be the next girl to be subjected to the experiments. That they would come for her. 

And they did.

####  17 September, 1946 

Just as the girls were lining up to go down to breakfast, Sorokina put her hand on Natasha's shoulder.

"Rybakova, with me."

Natasha was led to the infirmary. Past the rows of beds and they went until they reached one of the supply closets. Except that when it was opened, it revealed a staircase.

Down they went until they reached a dimly lit room. A hospital bed was in the middle. Shelves filled with strange devices lined the walls. Natasha was stripped and examined by Sorokina and a nurse who joined them. They poked and prodded her, drew blood from her arm, and strapped her down to the cot. A thick black band wrapped around her chest, smaller ones held down her wrists and ankles.

Two figures loomed overhead. The headmaster and the doctor, wearing white lab coats over their suits.

"Miss Rybakova," Volkov started. "How are you today?"

Natasha did not answer. He smiled.

"Do you know why you're here?"

She gave him the best blank stare she could muster. It fooled him.

"You have been chosen Rybakova. To become a part of something greater."

He motioned to Kudrin. The other man pushed a cart forward.

"Do you know who Captain America is?"

Natasha blinked as if she were to nod yes.

"Do you know how he got so strong?"

Natasha gave him a confused look.

"Because of this," Volkov picked up a syringe from the cart and held it up. The tip of the needle glistened.

"The super soldier serum. One dose and a man's strength is increased by over one hundred percent. He is immune to disease and injury. He becomes the perfect specimen."

Kudrin positioned himself at Natasha's left side. He tapped the crook of her arm with his fingers. 

"She's still," Kudrin remarked. "This is good. We don't need to use the other restraints."

"Indeed," Volkov said.

Natasha felt Volkov's fingers tap the crook of her right arm.

"You want to be strong don't you Miss Rybakova?" Volkov asked.

Natasha's heart pounded rapidly. Chills ran down her spine. The urge to scream bubbled in her throat. But she forced herself to remain calm.

"Good girl," Volkov smiled again. The light from overhead made his teeth unusually and uncomfortably bright. Natasha shut her eyes, almost blinded.

"Does anyone have the time?" Kudrin asked. 

"Fifteen past seven," came Sorokina's voice.

Kudrin reached over and took hold of another syringe. The two men hovered over her.

"Are you ready to begin a new life Miss Rybakova?" 

Natasha bit on her lip. A tear fell from the corner of her eye.

"You will become the best soldier the Soviet Union has ever seen."

They lowered the needles into her arms.

####  7 December, 1973 

The old man fumbled about his pockets for the key. His frail and wrinkled hand turned it in the lock. With a click, the office door opened. He entered. He turned on the lights to find that a young woman stood by his desk. 

She was tall, with vibrant long red hair. She wore a black knee length cocktail dress, with matching high heels and a black handbag that sat on the desk. She stoically glanced up.

"How did you get inside?" Volkov asked angrily.

"An old trick of mine," she cooly replied. "You should have expected me by now."

Confused, Volkov thought over the woman's words. She gaped at her in horror.

"You!" His voice shook. "It--it was _you!_ "

"That's right," she answered. "It was me. Everyone else was content to believe that Kudrin and Sorokina died of a heart attack, stroke, old age. Whatever they say kills the most. But I knew you would get the message."

"But why! _Why?_ "

"You know _why,_ " she hissed. "Do not make excuses for yourself Volkov. You put over three hundred girls through hell. You preyed on the ones who most needed help. You made them feel safe only to break them. Use them. Push them around like they were your little lab rats. And when they proved to be unfit to your rules, you killed them."

"But it was for--"

"A better Soviet Union? Do not give me that shit Volkov. We're past our prime. We're slowly turning into the laughingstock of the entire world."

She took a step forward. Volkov froze in his spot.

"I will make you pay for all you've done. First I will start by taking your life. Then, I will burn this school down to the ground. Isn't it convenient that the students and faculty are away at Moscow? And you're the only one who couldn't go on that trip? They'll come to the same conclusion; the old man tried to play scientist again and started a fire. Shame that he lost his memory. Wasn't he brilliant? Except no one will mourn you. Your ashes will be no different than the ones of this building. You will become nothing."

The woman seized Volkov by his arms. She dug her nails in as if they were claws. He grimaced. 

"Who? Who are you?" He exclaimed.

"I am the Black Widow," she said. "But before you forced me into this life, I was known as Natasha Rybakova."

She slammed Volkov into the desk. His back landed on the surface and he let out a shout. She moved quickly, sitting on his knees so that he wouldn't move. She pulled up his shirt sleeve and pushed his arm down. She reached into the handbag and took out a syringe.

"Do you know what's in this needle?" She asked, removing the cover on the tip. "Black Widow venom. The same one you used to kill the girls who defied you. Remember what you told me when you first met me? How important it was to act like the black widow? To act innocent and lure our victims in? You taught me well."

Her left hand grabbed his neck. The right hand moved closer to the crook of his arm. 

"This is for Sasha Gurkina. Olga Laskina. Irina Belkina. Eva Petrova. And all the others who came after!"

She jabbed the needle into the old man's arm and pushed down on the plunger. He let out a scream.

Natasha left him lying on the desk. His screams turned into whimpers as the venom rushed through his veins. She headed towards the lab where they kept the gasoline. She lugged gallons of it out and started her work. She poured gasoline on the hallway floors, making sure they touched every corner and line. When she was done, she headed towards the entrance. She took one last look as reached into her handbag again and took out the box of matches. She lit five matches in succession and threw them on the floor. She quickly headed out as the fire started to spread.

From a distance Natasha watched as the school burned. For the first time in a long time she let herself grieve. And yet through her tears,she smiled. She had delivered her justice, and no one else would suffer.

They called her the Black Widow. The deadliest assassin to ever walk the earth. But few knew that she carried the remnants of the fear that she experienced as a young girl long after the Black Widow Program disintegrated into ashes.


End file.
